Online Dating Clichés

Why not to write in your online dating bio: Here are the most cliché things I’ve observed on Bumble, a dating app similar to Tinder except that it requires women to initiate contact and has an expiration time on matches. Looking for a “down to earth” girl. – Really? Do these men frequently encounter women […]

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Online Dating Greetings: Don’t Cockblock Yourself

Posted by Princess MoMo on Dec 26 in Current Events, Dating, Dating Advice, MoMo's mind, MoMo's Musings, Online dating

“Hi.” “How are you?” “How’s your Tuesday?” “How was your breakfast?” “How are your holidays?” “You’re pretty. I’d like to get to know you.” “We have a lot in common. Let’s chat.”   Garbage.  Landfill quality, non-recyclable garbage worthy of no response other than, if at all, “thanks for the trash.” Think about it.  If […]

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Mr. Swiper – A Tinder Tale

Posted by Princess MoMo on Jul 6 in Adventures of Princess MoMo, Dating, Dating Advice, Epic fails, Men

  Mr. Swiper, a suitor from Tinder, had just moved to New York from Boston over 4th of July weekend. He’s originally from Minnesota. I don’t know what our Tinder exchange consisted of and I cannot check it because he’s unmatched me.  But, we pretty quickly moved from Tinder to text.  He then also pretty […]

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The Easter Bunny

I recently made the error of relegating my eggs to solitary confinement in someone’s basket of hypocrisy, insecurity, and self-absorption.  Should I tell you how I really feel?  Ok.  So, I had posted a lovely, poetic piece about my initial encounters with Mr. Redcoat.  As is the case with many first encounters, Mr. Redcoat sent […]

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Mr. JW: Another Prematurely Meet the Family Tale

Posted by Princess MoMo on Dec 29 in Adventures of Princess MoMo, Dating, Dating Advice, Men, Online dating

Mr. JW comes to us from the cyber world of dating.  Our first meeting was a simple “let’s grab drinks” tryst.  We got along well enough, but it was nothing to write home about…yet.  A few days later, he suggested another date.  His idea?  Mini golf.  He earned points for that, not because I like […]

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Ashley Madison Leak: Is Ignorance Bliss?

Posted by Princess MoMo on Aug 20 in Dating, Dating Advice, Miscellaneous

Hell hath no fury like a hacker scorned. One such hacker or group of hackers epically unleashed this fury by obtaining the personal information of a multitude of users of the infidelity-promoting dating site Ashley Madison. Do I personally have any sympathy for those exposed? Nope. None. Zero. Initially, a little part of me like […]

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Dating: Too many toothpastes

Posted by Princess MoMo on Aug 19 in Dating, Dating Advice, Dentist, Epic fails, Men, Miscellaneous

It’s 7 a.m. (Ok, it’s really 7:14 a.m. because it took you 14 minutes to get out of bed and into the bathroom to get ready for work.) So, it’s 7:14 a.m. You rub the sleep out of your eyes while reaching for your pink toothbrush.   The oral kingdom needs to be cleaned! To your disappointment, […]

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Mr. Super Annoyer’s Messages Annotated by Princess MoMo

For the backstory, click here.  Below are my notes/comments (in pink) to Mr. Super Annoyer’s messages. Have you ever wondered what a girl is thinking when she doesn’t respond to you?  See below.   everythingheisnt 3/31/2012 11:35:01 PM Oh my godddddd! I can’t believe I found you here! [Me neither.  Apparently, I can run, but […]

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Why Do Men Lie?

Posted by Princess MoMo on Jan 14 in Dating Advice, MoMo's Musings

Why do men lie?   I’ve been on this earth as a human being (as opposed to fetus, embryo, or whatever other physical form) for 10,327 days. For at least half of those days, if not more, I’ve had a love/hate relationship with the opposite sex. (It seems like recently they love me and I […]

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Shut ‘Em Down

Posted by Princess MoMo on Nov 5 in Dating, Dating Advice, Epic fails, Online dating

Sometimes (very, very rarely to be precise), I feel bad for harshly shutting down guys on dating sites.  No one likes rejection.  But then, I rethink my perspective and realize that I am actually doing them a service because I’m directly letting them know that their approach is a failure.  If they heed the warning, […]

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Online Dating Fails: The First of the April Fools

Not only do dating sites offer annoying ghosts of dating present, but also ghosts of dating past. I checked one of my online dating sites this morning (though I find myself virtually never responding to anyone these days) to find that one of the ghosts of dating past had written me a message. Below is […]

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Online Dating Fails: Astute Observation

Posted by Princess MoMo on Mar 3 in Dating Advice, Men, Online dating

      rush_blue 2/26/2012 6:26:17 PM response request:) rush_blue 3/3/2012 1:42:34 PM are u blowing me off   Analysis: Why yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing, Mr. Rush_Blue.  Messaging, “response request :)” and actually expecting a response is ballsy.  How about putting some thought into the message? I commend him, though, on recognizing and […]

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Another Cut/Paster

Posted by Princess MoMo on Feb 26 in Dating Advice, Epic fails, Online dating

At a minimum, if you’re going to send the same message over and over and over again, make it a clever one.  And, if you’re not even going to spend the time customizing messages, spell out “you.”   JKro 2/1/2012 5:51:19 AM I just wanted to let u kno that u are absolutely gorgeous. I’m […]

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PMS: The Cheese Stands Alone

Posted by Princess MoMo on Feb 25 in Adventures of Princess MoMo, Dating Advice, MoMo's mind, MoMo's Musings

Background I mostly deal with the male gender.  A vast majority of my friends are men.  My only sibling is y-chromosomed.  And, most of the humans with whom I work closely are of that persuasion as well.  Throughout my experiences, I’ve discovered that men don’t understand women, particularly their mood swings.   Men: You don’t […]

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Princess MoMo’s Valentine’s Day Advice

Posted by Princess MoMo on Feb 13 in Dating, Dating Advice, gchat, Princess MoMo's Friends

Male Friend:  You there Princess?   MoMo:  sup    Male Friend:  I have a dating question I have plans with [Girl] tomorrow for V-Day but I’m bored with her and will probably be ending it shortly My question is, should I break it off today and note keep the facade going through V-Day thus cancelling […]

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