The weekend following our rendezvous at Denny’s and subsequent arguments regarding his choice of associates, I went to DC. During my drive back on January 16, Mr. Lambo was driving down to Maryland. We crossed paths on the highway and decided to meet at a rest stop. It was in keeping with the chain restaurant theme. I did not eat because my system was recovering after being poisoned by the friend with whom I stayed in DC; it seemed to me that rest stop food would retard the system recovery process. I spent about 45 minutes with Mr. Lambo. Rest stops aren’t very eventful places, so there isn’t much to tell about this encounter.
Mr. Lambo proposed catching a movie that Friday (January 20). Seeing a movie in a theater is a great idea if you don’t want to talk to your date. Though I like talking to Lambo, I didn’t want to shit on his idea because I had previously hounded him about not being an effective date planner and the movie suggestion demonstrated a level of improvement. I spoke to him Friday morning on my way to work. He said he was going to see a movie during the day because his friend invited him to a special screening. I thought to myself, “Is he going to want to see two movies in one day?” But, again, I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to be an idea vampire.
Lo and behold, I called him on my way home from work and he did not mention our pre-determined plans. At one point, he asked what my plans were for the night. Umm really? I was not pleased with this inquiry. The bullshitary did not end there. He said he didn’t know what movies theaters there were in my area and hence he didn’t have a time, movie or location in mind. You see, there’s this modern day search engine called “Google.” It works wonders. It was too late and I was too irritated for us to hang out. We didn’t really communicate that weekend aside from a few texts.
That Monday (Jan. 23), he wanted to see me. I agreed. We were back to square one; Lambo did not have a plan. I looked up restaurants and chose a Thai one. It took him forever to get there because he drives like a legally blind geriatric (i.e., slowly). Finally, at 8:30 he showed up. We sat down to eat. About five minutes after the food arrived, his device lit up and he said, “I have to take this, it’s a conference call we have every Monday night.” I sat there picking at my food while he engaged in his teleconference. I’m not very judging about device usage while on a date because I’m a habitual device user, but a lengthy telephone conversation was out of bounds even for me. Eventually, he disconnected from the call. We decided to relocate to the infamous Friday’s in my bumblefuck town.
We had taken separate cars. I arrived at Friday’s first. When Lambo walked in, he was again back on his conference call. I was highly displeased. He eventually finished the call. I said, “You know that’s really obnoxious, right?” He responded that this conference call was scheduled for every Monday. I told him I didn’t give a fuck. He hadn’t told me beforehand. And, if he knew he had a call at 9 pm every Monday, then he shouldn’t have asked that we meet up that night. We spent some more time together (sans conference calls) and then departed.
He asked if I wanted to see him that Friday. I agreed. You might be wondering why. I am too. There’s no logical explanation. He has some sort of emotional appeal to me. Emotions are irrational mind fuckers. My mind was being fucked by my own emotions. Luckily, my mind is strong and it ultimately overcomes the evil E.
That Thursday, I got on his case. I asked what he wanted to do on Friday. I said that I didn’t want to waste another Friday by agreeing to hang out with him and then ending up sitting home doing nothing because he has no agenda. I told him that I had spoon fed him a date idea (shooting) a few weeks prior when I had been tempted to go out with another guy because he wanted to take me to a shooting range and I had never shot a gun before. Lambo said he’d take care of it. On Friday (Jan. 27), he texted asking if I could meet him at a shoot range in PA by 6 pm. I told him that was definitely not doable. Once again, I called him on the way home from work. I assumed that he would have come up with another idea given I had told him that I couldn’t be out of work in time for the shooting escapade. My assumption was incorrect. I was pissed at what I perceived as a lack of effort on his part. I did not see him that night. In fact, I haven’t seen him since January 23.
Last Friday (Feb. 10), essentially the same scenario played out where he asked to hang out and then had no plan. There’s no point in detailing it any further because it was pretty much a repeat of the above-described scenarios. As a working professional residing in the vortex of suburbia, Friday night is a very valuable piece of time real estate. This was at least the third Friday of mine he had reserved and then disappointed. I will include on more detail about last Friday. He was supposed to pick up an Escalade because he wrecked (but not totaled) his Eclipse. He didn’t end up getting the Escalade until Saturday.
He asked that we have one last date on Valentine’s Day. I asked why. His explanation was that he had fallen short from the beginning and he wanted to go out on a high note.
To be continued…
Click here for the initial online dating site exchange with Mr. Lambo.
Click here for Part I of Mr. Lambo’s rendition of the facts of the first date.
Click here for Part II of Mr. Lambo’s rendition of the facts of the first date.
Click here for Part III of Mr. Lambo’s rendition of the facts of the first date.
Click here for Part I of Princess MoMo’s rendition of the facts of the first date.
Click here for Part II of Princess MoMo’s rendition of the facts of the first date.
Click here for Mr. Lambo’s rendition of the facts of the second date.
Click here for Princess MoMo’s rendition of the facts of the second date.
Click here for Part I of Mr. Lambo’s rendition of the facts of the third date.
Click here for Part I of Princess MoMo’s rendition of the facts of the third date.
Click here for Part II of Mr. Lambo’s rendition of the facts of the third date.
Click here for Part II of Princess MoMo’s rendition of the facts of the third date.
Click here for a picture of Mr. Lambo’s Lambo.
Click here for Mr. Lambo Update (MoMo’s Version)
Click here for Mr. Lambo Update by Mr. Lambo.
Click here for Another post about Mr. Lambo (by Mr. Lambo)
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