Mr. Buffalo Bill and I Bumble matched and exchanged some decent banter. Because we live near one another, we agreed to meet for a drink. I presented my exit strategy pre-meeting, notifying him that the drink would have to be quick because I had to go walk my creatures. I spotted him seated at […]
Homeless Penis
Apparently, a pastor wrote that women are penis homes. Finding that concept hysterical, I wanted to incorporate it in conversation. So, I did.
Mr. Rx Part I
A good Samaritan coworker informed me that he had a specimen in mind for me. Why he would throw his friend under the bus like that, I do not know. Actually, I do know. He told me that this friend of his was not the nicest of guys to the last girl he dated. Essentially, he […]
Mr. Lambo: The Relapse
Ten days after we’d parted ways, I relapsed (Feb. 26). It was a week after Brandon Singer had abruptly ditched his wedding date duties. I was lying in bed and felt the sudden urge to call Mr. Lambo. So I did. He answered. We spoke for about an hour and then resumed our routine of […]
Mr. Trash Can (March 24, 2011 dissection Part I)
Click here to read how we met. Click here to read about our second encounter. I met Mr. Trash Can on April 13, 2011. Overall, our first date was enjoyable. He’s attractive, intelligent and a decent conversationalist. At one point, the conversation shifted to politics. It stayed there for a bit until he said, “I […]
I Hate Brandon Singer Part II
Not much has changed since “I Hate Brandon Singer Part I,” except that he has defriended me on facebook. Apparently, he didn’t like my entry recounting his bullshitary, nor did he like the fact that I posted a courtesy copy of said entry on his facebook wall. To quickly recap, I met Brandon Singer […]
I Hate Brandon Singer Part I
Years ago, I used to drive through Philly very often on my travels back and forth between Jersey and DC. One billboard always caught my attention. It says, “I HATE STEVEN SINGER.” Every time I saw it, I wondered what it is about. But, by the time I’d get to my destination, I’d have forgotten […]
Mr. Lamborghini’s Lambo
I requested verification of Mr. Lambo’s Lamborghini ownership. He picture texted me the photograph below, depicting the Lambo and the Eclipse. Obviously, a copy of the title would serve as better proof, but I can only work with what I’m given for now. ——————————————————————————————————————————————- Your “likes” and comments are encouraged and appreciated. Thanks. ——————————————————————————————————————————————- Related Posts: […]
Racist Cookies
(Texts with a friend) Friend: The most racist cookie ever … MoMo: Did they place them right next to the crackers? Friend: Hahaha good one but no. Negro cookies were segregated by the check out area.
Mr. T: The End for Real (I think)
Background: This happened last Sunday and Monday (11/6-7), but I waited to post it because I didn’t want to give him the benefit of reading my analysis/commentary before I knew how the situation was going to play out. I maintain multiple facebook accounts. Mr. T had the pleasure of being friends with me on two […]
Mr. T on the Rise Again? (11/2)
Recently, I thought I ended things with Mr. T. Apparently, I thought wrong. The morning after I posted Mr. T’s Rendition of Our First Date, he texted me: Mr. T: They love mr t Mr. T: You are a bad producer. You killed him off too soon. MoMo: Talk to his agent about recasting him Mr. T: Mr t […]
The Decline of Mr. T
Background: Mr. T and I were having a conversation on Facebook the other day. At some point (where the excerpt below starts), the conversation went off of the deep end. I learned that in addition to having a guitar, he has a skateboard. After Mr. Plane, I wanted a guy with a unique vehicle. A […]
Mr. T’s Rendition of Our First (and maybe last?) Date
Again, Mr. T has been so gracious as to provide his perspective on another one of our encounters: Our first date. There are several factual inaccuracies in his write up. As you might expect, I will highlight each and every one with “Editor’s Notes.” ——————————————————————————————————————————————- A few days after the charity auction I saw bunches […]
Date Dissection 10/22 (Mr. T)
Click here to read the Mr. T Intro Last time we left off, Mr. T had suggested an activity involving horses (get your mind out of the gutter, you sickos). I vetoed anything horse-related. The next day, he texted me with a substitute idea. The Text Exchange Mr. T: It’s a lovely day to […]