Princess MoMo

Do you believe love conquers all? Does a true and perfect love make life all worthwhile? To you, what is love? Is it just a feeling, the way how it feels to be in love, or is it more than the mere sum of those pleasurable sensations and experiences? Hello, I’m Bo and I really like the way you expressed yourself through your photos and profile… and admittingly even though it is a longshot, I have a intuitive hunch that given the right circumstances we’d be great for each other and make one another genuinely very happy for a long time.

Would you find it in your heart to date someone who couldn’t have sex? Don’t be grossed out. Please allow me to explain. There are lots of girls who are upfront on their profiles and post prominently about their virginity and intention to remain abstinent until marriage. I think it is because they wish to avoid at all costs the confrontational awkwardness that might ensue if they didn’t reveal that part about themselves until much later on in the relationship when it got serious… This why its sometimes important to be on the same page from the start so there are no unpleasant surprises or gotchas.

Long story short, a few years ago I was involved in a serious car accident and it damaged my manhood and it had to be amputated. I’ve since fully recovered but I have lost the use of my male organ and cannot have sex. It was doubly devastating because my girlfriend Sarah of three years initially supported me and felt pity for me but eventually she left and could not put up with the lack of sex. Our relationship just changed and wasn’t the same anymore. She grew distance, less loving and far more easily frustrated and snappy and less patient. Over time she started seeing other guys on the side and then it just fell apart. I know you probably think a relationship is not just about sex and if she loved me she would have stayed… but unless and until you find yourself in a similar situation I think it would not be prudent to so easily pass judgment on her… because its a lot easier for someone uninvolved and on the ‘sidelines’ to make a judgment call… but if you were seriously dating a man who would never be able to have sex with you again and could never get your pregnant I think resentment and hostility might build on over time… but maybe I’m wrong about the type of girl that you are? I sure hope so, that is one of the reasons why I’m taking this chance in messaging you. Since the break up with Sarah all the girls tell me that I’ll find the right one and someone will come along that doesn’t care about that kind of stuff, but its disheartening to be told by the girls I’ve expressesd interest in that “some other girl” is right for me. If I’m not the right guy for you I understand, I just hope you don’t laugh this off and ridicule at how pathetic I am.

If your future husband loved you very much and treated you well in every other way possible would that be enough? Love and lust are two entirely different emotional experiences… its almost like comparing apples to oranges… Love is softer, more gentle, kinder, an unconditional selfless “liking” of the other person… its a distinctly pleasurable experience in its own right… but then so is the exhilarating passion of physical intimacy and 1ust and the rush and excitement of the “inevitable” of orgasm, etc… These two diametrically opposite and sometimes mutually exclusive desires BOTH seek for a girls attention but does one override or “win out” against or at the expense of another? Probably this is different for each girl and the answer can only ever be answered on an individual case-by-case basis… so that is why I’m asking you! I wish to know what YOU think about it.

Tell me what you think. Good sex doesn’t make a relationship… but does poor sex or a total and complete lack of sex also ruin what would have been a great and loving relationship? Is it possible to fall in love and stay in love without having sex?

Would you give me a chance to date you or at least get to know you better as a person? On one hand its awkward to start off our first conversation talking about sex, but on the other hand I would hate to be accused of leaving out pertinent information…so I’m torn… you seem like such an attractive and wonderful girl and I would regret it forever if I just left things to chance and gave up without even attempting to get the opportunity to talk to you… If you know for sure 100% that this is a deal-breaker then I’m so sorry to have wasted your time… otherwise can I please have your name and the privilege of getting to know you?

I know we live far away from each other. Which was one additional reason that made me initially hesistant to message you. I know it really stacks the odds against us working out. But I truly felt you are a very compelling girl and so to heck with it I signed up and gave it a shot… as far as long distance relationships goes, what is it that you think breaks a girlfriends spirit? Be honest… Is it the lack of physical intimacy (sex) *or* is it perhaps the loneliness or depression that results from the absense of emotional connection (body language, the tones and moods evoked from being together in each other’s physical presence) that makes a girl tempted to stray or get involved with someone closer to home? Do you think on some levels all girls NEED that sort of emotional attention or else she loses interest very quickly and moves on?

I’ve read the book “The 5 Love Languages” and I think most of the time for a girl her love language is TOUCH. Most girls are just born that way, as in the touchy kind of person, without kisses and hugs and cuddles girls usually lose interest fast… and believe it or not girls are very visual when in a romantic relationship too…. without constant visual stimulation they usually cannot maintain or sustain a long distance dating relationship and it becomes very difficult for them to hold on to that love. So for most girls when in a long distance relationship her partner just becomes a “story” to her and out-of-sight out-of-mind… kind of thing were she feels like since he is not physically there then she might as well keep her options open… and then with that kind of thinking it just falls apart. On the other hand I’ve known couples who have done the open-but-closed long distance relationship thing and made it work. Basically to say that sex is just sex, but emotional connection is what keeps the relationship alive.

So are you the type of girl who is open to the potential of a long distance relationship that could lead to something more and lasting? or are you totally against and closed to the idea completely? Either way I’d love to hear back from you… even if it is just to be let down gently… I’ve been dissappointed so many times in the past that I’ve kind of grown used to it.. but still I’m not giving up hope that there might be a girl out there who can love me for me despite my physical setback… Sorry for this long winded message, I promise not all my letters are this long! Anyway I hope you’ll allow me to privelege to get to know you and find out more about what makes you tick!