Mr. Buffalo Bill and I Bumble matched and exchanged some decent banter. Because we live near one another, we agreed to meet for a drink. I presented my exit strategy pre-meeting, notifying him that the drink would have to be quick because I had to go walk my creatures. I spotted him seated at […]
Online Dating Clichés
Why not to write in your online dating bio: Here are the most cliché things I’ve observed on Bumble, a dating app similar to Tinder except that it requires women to initiate contact and has an expiration time on matches. Looking for a “down to earth” girl. – Really? Do these men frequently encounter women […]
Traitor Jo Rap
Honesty is the best policy, but your pathology had you chronically lying to me, now you come with an apology for the distorted and twisted chronology, but it’s not genuine, much like reverse psychology, time to clean up that shit, call it a cleansing colonoscopy No hard feelings or bad blood, bet you can relate […]
Mr. Traveler Part III
Click here for Part I Click here for Part II Day 3 The following morning, I left before he did. Neither of us knew what the other was up to that evening, which was fine because, after all, we were merely host and traveler, right? He wasn’t home when I arrived from work. Shortly thereafter, […]
Mr. Traveler Part II
Click here for Part I DAY 2 I hate mosquitoes, but my woes with mosquitoes had not yet begun at this point. So, we’ll save that passionate tirade for another time. On Day 2, I woke up and prepared myself to go out into the world to be adult as fuck. (MoMo to English translation: […]
Mr. Traveler
Mr. Traveler A good friend of mine (we’ll call her Ms. Host) had some overflow in her AirBnB reservations and so she asked me if I was interested in hosting one of her travelers. Thus, I decided to join the hospitality industry, which as it turns out, is arguably more entertaining than dating and the […]
Mr. Swiper – A Tinder Tale
Mr. Swiper, a suitor from Tinder, had just moved to New York from Boston over 4th of July weekend. He’s originally from Minnesota. I don’t know what our Tinder exchange consisted of and I cannot check it because he’s unmatched me. But, we pretty quickly moved from Tinder to text. He then also pretty […]
PATH Train Tales
Yesterday, on the PATH train, I spotted a male individual who was clearly scheming up some bullshit way to strike up a conversation with me. At the first stop, a seat behind me freed up and he took the opportunity to speak to me by informing me of the seat’s availability. I thanked him […]
Mr. Redcoat’s Rendition Annotated with Princess MoMo’s Comments
Lest we forget, at the end of the day, this is my blog. While I permit other’s perspectives, I would be remiss not to directly comment on the rendition. So, because this is princessmomo.com and not mrredcoat.com, I’m going to go Kanye West on his post. I’ma let you finish, but…my comments on his content […]
Mr. Hong Kong in New York
Click here for Mr. Hong Kong Part I (Vegas Pink Monkey). Click here for Mr. Hong Kong Part II (The Getaway). Click here for Mr. Hong Kong Part III (Sodom, Gomorrah, and Rihanna). Click here for Mr. Hong Kong Part IV (Let There be Light). Click here for Mr. Hong Kong Part V (Farewell). I […]
The Easter Bunny
I recently made the error of relegating my eggs to solitary confinement in someone’s basket of hypocrisy, insecurity, and self-absorption. Should I tell you how I really feel? Ok. So, I had posted a lovely, poetic piece about my initial encounters with Mr. Redcoat. As is the case with many first encounters, Mr. Redcoat sent […]
Mr. Redcoat: ‘Twas 13 Nights Before Christmas
‘Twas 13 nights before Christmas, when all through the City Drunk Santas were stirring, sipping, and getting shitty; Amateurs were imbibing with not a bit of a care, We even witnessed one person fall off her chair. Predators were prowling for prey to place snug in their beds, While visions of getting it in […]
Mr. JW: Another Prematurely Meet the Family Tale
Mr. JW comes to us from the cyber world of dating. Our first meeting was a simple “let’s grab drinks” tryst. We got along well enough, but it was nothing to write home about…yet. A few days later, he suggested another date. His idea? Mini golf. He earned points for that, not because I like […]
Mr. Crazy, Esq.
I don’t write these stories; they practically write themselves. Once upon a time, I attended a reputable institution of higher learning. While there, I met Mr. Crazy, Esq. We weren’t best friends and we weren’t lovers. One might categorize us as kind-of-friends, at best. I’ll explain how we met later in the story. Anyway, one […]
Mr. Super Annoyer – Six and a half years later
Six and a half wretched YEARS ago, the specimen gods shat up Mr. Super Annoyer into my life. Aside from the party at which I met him, I willingly subjected myself to him once more. That was all. At the conclusion of that day, a day long ago, I explicitly stated to him that I was […]