Online Dating Fails: Dennis is alive and it turns out he is a menace.

Posted by Princess MoMo on Apr 19 in Epic fails, Men, Online dating

Not too long ago, I posted Mr. Dennis’s opening message to me on this dating site.   This is the sequel.

Subject line: wow a stuck up grammer bitch you are

Message: are you serious you make a big deal over the simplexity of certain words. I’m glad I have no chance with you Ms. I’m the smartest of the vocabilist of people.BYE 

I’m glad I have no chance with you Ms. I’m the smartest of the vocabilist of people.BYE

 

Princess’s Reply:

Dennis,

A peahen chooses its mate by the size and shape of his tail because the largest tail indicates a healthy bird and a better chance for healthy offspring. In fact, about 150 years ago, a wise man by the name of Charles Darwin wrote that animals don’t pick their mates by pure chance; rather, it’s a process that is deliberate and involves numerous factors. One of the many factors I consider is whether the male specimen communicating with me speaks and writes proper English. Improper your/you’re usage is a signal that he does not. And if I had any doubts about your inability to adequately command the English language based on your first message, your second message allayed them. You’ve demonstrated the “simplexity” of your brain, and therefore inadequacy as a potential mate for me. If the peahen exhibits selectivity in her choice of mate, surely I should do the same. Now I must go because I have a following of “vocabilist” people who depend on me to provide witty entertainment since I am the smartest of them.

P.S. You spelled grammar wrong in the subject line.

comments: 6 » tags:

6 Responses to “Online Dating Fails: Dennis is alive and it turns out he is a menace.”

  1. shifty says:

    OMG!!!! Simplexity!? Vocabilist?! Where do these people come from?

  2. I’m the smartest of the vocabilist people. What an accomplishment.

  3. All hail the vocabilist queen!!

  4. I should change my blog URL to princessvocabilist.com

  5. shifty says:

    Careful, I might buy it. ;)

  6. what a Sal he ended up being…