Princess MoMo

Interestingly, my new online dating profile has been inspiring poetic messages.  I am pleased with that result.  Below is an example.

Shakespearean Specimen: Prince MoMo I may or may not be, but certainly a troll you shall not see. Whether you seek my company or that of another, I value my lady as taught by my mother. I come from another far off place where the value of one’s person is more prized than her body or face. Princess MoMo, you are the sweetest of eye candy to me, but that which I seek lies beyond what I see. The prize that is sought is not a trophy wife, but a series of adventure with shared life. If “love is not to look at one another, but to look together in the same direction,” then let us set course if there’s truly a connection. May your search be merry and with no more trolls, hobgoblins, and elves or even shifty princes who think only of themselves. If you’d like to meet me I promise not to stare, except of course in the direction we may share.

Princess MoMo: Well done on writing a poem to me. It was entertaining enough to be response worthy. That’s more than I can say for the others on this site. They send me a bunch of sh*t that in nature is trite. Anyway, my lyricism will now come to a close. I look forward to reading what you will next compose.

Shakespearean Specimen: Good evening, Princess! How are you? I’m glad that I was able to capture your attention. Looking back on it I see where it doesn’t
read as nicely as I’d hoped. That’s what happens when your wonderfully creative profile gets me excited with visions of a great smile and fun loving intellect. Intelligence is very important to me. And problem solvers are known for being smarter. So essentially what do you do?

I moved to Philadelphia to take a job with Boeing. It was a great move and I’ve met so many great friends! Sadly I’m just now exploring the area. Last year I trained for and ran in an Ironman triathlon. I knew how much training I was going to need. Sleep. Additional sleep on the other hand, I did not. This year I’m focusing on exploring the area and meeting people. Hopefully find someone who enjoys a deep conversation and my bad humor. Certainly we are all looking for “chemistry” but what is your ideal relationship? I’d like one where we complement one another and see each other as equals.

Do you find aggressive guys attractive? Because I’ll be the first to tell you, I’m a softy – for the most part. That doesn’t mean I won’t kick someone’s @ss, just not for bumping into me. I grew up in WV in a rural area. So I am far more relaxed. And I’ll enjoy the evening more knowing that you are having a great time. Perhaps that’s the southern hospitality. Also I’m not the guy who tries to control everything. Where we eat, what we eat, the wine, who orders the wine… I don’t care. Seeing you smile, hearing your laugh, holding your hand, connecting – that’s important to me. I sincerely hope this finds you well!

Ps. I’ve heard that the toothbrush was invented in WV and that had it be invented elsewhere it would have been a teethbursh. Oddly, I have all 31 of my teeth ;-)

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Analysis:  He had a very strong opening message, but his follow up was a.) too long and b.) boring.  That’s a bad combination.  Message number two was almost worthy of a TLDR response (short for “too long, didn’t read”).  Moreover, his “jokes” at the end are not funny at all and he essentially communicated that his testicular arena is more like a baby nursery than a bullfighting ring (“I’m a softy – for the most part.”).  While I’m not interested in a roid raging fight monger, a “softy” isn’t ideal, partially because I have a strong personality and I don’t want a guy who is going to sit in the corner crying everyday because I said something that hurts his precious feelings.  Many of the questions he asked are probably better suited for live conversation, rather than online messaging and a lot of it seems like generic crap (e.g., talk about “chemistry”).  Next.

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Your “likes” and comments are encouraged and appreciated.  Thanks.

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