Princess MoMo

Seriously, I might start packin’ heat when I go to Shoprite. First, that place is ALWAYS overcrowded regardless of the time of day. Second, somehow I always end up behind the jerkoff who needs a price check which takes 2340534 minutes, but I can’t easily go to another line because I’ve already placed my items on the conveyor belt and there are people behind me blocking in. Third, there’s usually parking lot drama. Today’s incident: Somehow, it didn’t dawn on me to go to the express lane, despite the fact that I only had seven items. Without fail, the unpleasant waste of life in front of me needed a price check. I stood there waiting out until finally the price was attained. It was my turn. The cashier speedily rang me up. I left the store. As I walked to the MoMo-mobile, there was a HUGE SUV-like vehicle pulling out. I moved to the other side of the parking row, but kept walking. The bitch operating the vehicle, incidentally the same bitch who held me up in the check out line, had the audacity to open her window and say, “You almost walked into my car while I was backing out.” I responded, “I’m the pedestrian. You’re the driver. I saw you and moved away. Maybe you should be more careful.” She kept talking. This enraged me. She said, “And you should get off of your phone too, it’s so rude to walk around talking on your phone.” I replied, “You should go fuck yourself and stop talking to me.” She KEPT talking!!! I tuned her out because I was too infuriated to go on with this bullshit dialogue. I’m not sure who appointed her as the etiquette fairy, but I will continue to conduct conversations on my device in public if that is what I so desire.