I can’t seem to catch a break on the shirts the specimens wear during my in-person encounters with them. I’ve written about this issue at least three times on this blog (the worst shirt, the most homo shirt, the stupid shirt). And there were plenty of other detestable shirts in between. Last night, I went out […]
Online Dating Fails: Generic, Cheesy, Grammatically Flawed Crap
Specimen: I loved reading your profile, it really caught my eye. I am a hopeless romantic, that believes if your lucky enough to find the right person you always try to keep them swept off there feet. I love to write poetry, short stories, and aspire to write a novel. I am not a […]
Princess MoMo on Politics
What started out as a grammar nazi comment on a facebook status, turned into a lengthy political "debate." I generally refrain from these sorts of discussions because I get too fired up; however, I made an exception because I was in some kind of vicious mood yesterday. The names of the liberals have been changed […]
Repository of Knowledge
Below is a message exchange between a college friend and P-Mo. College Friend: Just got a text from my younger sister, "Are all guys complete idiots or are you all secretly taken aside at a young age and taught very dumb things to say at bad times?" I, of course, directed her to your […]
T-Mobile SUCKS DICK
T-Mobile Asshole: Our engineers say that coverage in your area is limited because of the terrain, buildings and foliage. Me: So are you suggesting I move to an open field? T-Mobile Asshole: That would definitely help to increase the signal strength. Me: Does that seem like a reasonable solution to you? I should move to […]
Online Dating: DOMINATION
Specimen: Dominant specimen I see. What are your thoughts on power exchange? Any luck with this site? Princess MoMo: Thanks for visiting my blog :) Please elaborate on this power exchange you mentioned. Specimen: Have you ever dominated a male before? Princess MoMo: I'm not answering that in writing. For all […]
Online Dating Fails: New Series – Name that HATER!
I recently released a post in which I theorized the motivations of various categories of male online dating HATERs. I thought it would be fun if we all play a game called, "Name that HATER." Below is a message from a male specimen. See if you can identify which type of HATER he is. (Don't […]
Online Dating Fails: Mirror, mirror on the wall…who’s the least perceptive of them all?
Preface: What is one to do when blatant honesty doesn't work? In his defense, persistence is often the difference between success and failure. Not in this case though. 7/19/2011 12:10:39 AM Specimen: Hey there, how are you doing?? You seem cool and we should chat :) I am a good guy so you should reply […]
Online Dating Fails: Will you marry me?
Specimen: Would you like to get married, have kids and start a family with me?? Princess MoMo: No, thank you. Specimen: Why? Am I that ugly? Princess MoMo: I know this may come as a shock, but there’s more to relationships than looks. Specimen: I am shocked…most of the women on here judge men […]
Online Dating Fails: Guest Submission
For better or for worse, Princess MoMo is not the only female who receives less than stellar messages from online dating specimens. Below is an exchange that comes to you courtesy of a friend of Princess MoMo. Jul 28, 2011 – 3:42pm Specimen: Hi there. I think you're cure. Not sure about those button […]
Online Dating: Does size matter?
Specimen: I must say, I absolutely loved the way you wrote your profile! I fit the job description nearly 100%… but alas, I do not meet the height requirements. I am wondering if you would still accept my resume for consideration? I feel as though I could be a valuable asset to your company. […]
HATERs, BITCHES, JEWs, and BULLLLYs
My online dating profile garners much attention, both positive and negative. This post focuses on the motives of the naysayers. I am going to put on my pseudo-psychotherapist hat and provide my theories as to why a Headstrong Asshole That Exhibits Rudeness (“HATER” for short) would write unconstructive messages to women. Theory One: A […]
Online Dating: More fan mail
Lately, I've released several "hate mail" containing posts. (There is a reason for that. You'll find out on 7/26/11.) Lest you subscribe to the mistaken belief that most online daters are assholes, here are some of the positive messages I've received. How are u princess? Ive read your profile and i loved it. […]
Online Dating Fails: Hater wishes disability on MoMo
July 21, 2011 Hater Specimen: I would simply just like to know where you had that picture taken, the one where you are sitting on what seems to be a very grand window, with those beautiful clouds in the background. July 21, 2011 Princess MoMo: That picture was taken in Italy. July […]
Online Dating Fails: Chic Repellent’s almost unilateral conversation
Today's message exchange comes to you (well originally to me) courtesy of OkStupid.com. July 19, 2011 CHIC MAGNET: Hunterdon County? I stay in Clinton alot. I would really love to speak to you some time! July 19, 2011 PRINCESS MoMo: What do you do in Clinton? July 19, 2011 – 4:03pm CHIC […]