Mother Fucking Joe Follow-up On Tuesday July 19, 2011, Princess MoMo initiated contact via facebook with Mother Fucking Joe. He told her a tale about a hooker. Later that night, the two conversed on the telephone and agreed to meet on Thursday, July 21, 2011. MoMo did not hear from Mother Fucking Joe on […]
Online Dating Fails: Another dissatisfied customer
Mr. Dissatisfied: Do you really think somebody will put up with this attitude.. Jebus.. pissed me off and i only read thru first few lines of your profile. They want a little about yourself not an essay :) MoMo: When I go to the store and see an item on the shelf/rack that I do not […]
MoMo the Leprechaun
As of late, I'm starting to become suspicious of whether specimens are sending me legitimate messages or whether they're intentionally attempting to reach unparalleled levels of outrageousness bordering schizophrenia in order get a spot on the blog. If it is the former, the pharmaceutical industry will continue to thrive. If it's the latter, then […]
Online Dating Fails: Stalkerdate.com – HippyMike the Poet
After countless communications and dates with unfulfilling specimens, Princess MoMo has officially quit her quest for Prince MoMo. However, her online dating profiles remain active AND for the greater good, your entertainment (yes, she's a benevolent Princess), from time to time, she joins new dating sites. Last time she joined a new site, she quickly (in […]
MoMo’s Apology to Capo
After today's post about MoMo and Mafioso, MoMo discovered that Capo defriended her blog facebook profile. Surprisingly, MoMo's Jiminy Cricket surfaced. She messaged Capo the following: Capo- I see you've taken the liberty of defriending me, presumably because of my blog post publicizing our cyber interaction. I have this internal parasite that I just can't […]
MoMo and the Mafioso
This self-proclaimed Capo, a facebook random, has been on a diligent pursuit to unite MoMo (or Diva, as he refers to her) with Mafioso (or Capo/Don/Boss/Angel as he refers to him). The negotiations are below: June 2, 2011 Capo: You look like a Diva/Angel, So so hot, I would to have dinner or cafe, […]
Online Dating: Mother Fucking Joe and his Hooker Tale
Princess MoMo and Mother Fucking Joe began corresponding in April. After their exchanges on the dating site, communication was limited to periodic facebook comments and the occasional facebook message. Over the course of their facebook friendship, MoMo recognized that Mother Fucking Joe was consistently amusing. Ergo, she decided she wanted to meet him. Below is […]
Online Dating Fails: Hate Mail
Specimen: your profile was a delight to skim through. I wish you an incredible amount of luck in finding a man patient enough to deal with such a pessimistic person as yourself. The pretentiousness of this was seriously tragic yet beautiful. I hope i'm never as mean spirited as you possibly are to people in your life, seeing […]
Online Dating: Locks of Love – A specimen <3s MoMo's hair
Specimen: wow, you have awesome hair!! MoMo: Thanks. Looks like you have something in common with lionesses. In selecting a mate, they favor males with the densest, darkest mane. Specimen: wait a minute…… did you just call me a girl?? MoMo: The commonality I was referring to was a predilection for a certain hair type, […]
Robocop: The Confession
Preface: The confession is somewhat anticlimactic. So if you’re disappointed at the end because you were expecting something juicer, don’t say you weren’t warned. Introduction Once upon a time, in late 2005, Princess MoMo became acquainted with one known to the MoMo cyber world as Robocop. Despite MoMo’s deep-seated dislike for the boys in […]
Gchats: Apparently Colorado has the best man inventory
MoMo: how are the men? Jen: men? Where? haha MoMo: haha tell me about it… Jen: I managed to hook up with my friend’s brother, the best man at his wedding which was just great I’m such a cliche haha He was really my ideal kind of guy and we emailed for a few weeks but he lives […]
Online Dating Fails: Mr. Comprehensive
Specimen: hope you are doing great on this day. On my part always busy between work and school but at list I enjoy what I am doing. About me? well my life is pretty simple with no drama. Whatever it is in the pass is already done, I am just looking at the future for […]
Online Dating: A specimen questions MoMo’s realness
Specimen: Subject line: Are you for real?? Yes, that is exactly what i am wondering!! Are you for real?? Who in the world has time to write such a detailed description?? May I know the reason for this extremely time consuming act? Thanks, Andy MoMo: Yes, to quote the infamous Snoop Dogg, I’m “realer than […]
Online Dating Fails: Did he mention he’s a scientist?
Scientist: I only take tests if I am getting paid, but since you have a nice smile I will work for half price. We are located some distance apart. After searching in my local area, you would think an ENTIRE CITY of Philadelphia, I would be able to find what I am looking for. however […]
Online Dating Fails: A grammar lesson from an online dater (don’t heed his advice)
Specimen: You’re so right or should I say it like the rest of the idiots do your so right lol .. I get emails from women all the time that are educated and have great jobs that use the wrong grammar all the time and I do not understand it at all.. Theirs a method […]