The status messages preceding the conversation with Century Link: April 13, 2011 8:43 am: Waiting out with bated breath from 8-1 on the Century Link wizards to resolve the technology issues at my residence. If I don’t post again before 1, I’ve suffocated. 10:19 am: The time is now 10:19 a.m. Do you know where your Century […]
Emails to Ex Specimens: The Fishman Swims Upstream – Part 2
EMAIL FROM SPECIMEN TO PRINCESS (in response to this) my nuts are better. while having essentially an opposite mental and emotional connotation than your opening, it too is a great opening line. I thought it necessary to tell you, because with my recent healing I feel as though I just stopped pms’ing. It is amazing […]
Emails to Ex Specimens: Mike
I once sent an email to a specimen I was dating at the time with the subject line “A picture for you” with the following picture attached to the body. After all, a picture is worth a thousand words.
Emails to Ex Specimens: The Fishman Swims Upstream – Part 1
EMAIL FROM PRINCESS TO SPECIMEN i just got my period. great opening line, i know. but the implication is that i didn’t know i was pmsing this last week. i had a suspicion because i was inexplicably bitchy in the way that i am when i’m pmsing. umm but the thing is that i just […]
Late Night Phone Calls: Geographic Constraints
Princess MoMo: Damnit Phil. I was really hoping you’d accept this friend request earlier. I wanted to drunk dial you this past weekend and I thought your number may be on your profile, which incidentally it is! Boo. Phil: lol, feel free to drunk dial it whenever! Princess MoMo: If only it were that easy Phil. You see, […]
Online Dating Fails: Family-Tie-Breaking-Grammar
Guy: Me, LLC, believes Me, Inc. is an established and successful organization driven by creativity and passion. The CEO may be sarcastic, but definitely intelligent and playful and deserving of the same. A successful business partnership is no doubt in teh near future for Me Inc. Seriously, great profile…all of it. And when did English […]
Online Dating Fails: Hukd on fonix with 2 high school diplomas
Guy: hey hun how are you doing? i dont kno if im anythin close to what ur lookin 4 so if ur at all interested definitely let me know id love the chance to get to kno u Princess: You know what would have given you some insight into what I’m looking for? Reading my profile. […]
Online Dating Fails: Mystery
Guy: …youre stunning…and very intriguing. :) So, how does one learn more about the woman behind the beautiful exterior ? ;) Ty Princess: Some things must remain a mystery. Guy: Interesting response…is that a clever brushoff ;) or an indication that some things about a person remain mysteries? Eithers fine…just seeking clarity. :) Princess: It was […]
Princess MoMo’s Glossary (work in progress)
Superseded by the Glossary Page 23er – A prime-aged specimen. ADAM – Captain Average Dull And Mundane Advisory Board – A group of friends with which one confers to gauge one’s perception of reality. bullshitary – Complete and utter bullshit. Device – A reference to a Smart Phone. Example: I keep my device on silent […]
The 3-Day Rule
Evidently there's this unwritten 3-day rule, a rule which much is written about, and a rule with which many of you are familar. For the unfamiliar ones, this rule boils down to this: After going on a first date, a man should wait 3 days before making contact with the woman. This rule is ineffective, […]