On Tuesday, June 14, 2011, this specimen initiated cyber contact with Princess MoMo. That night, the two conversed on the telephone. They agreed to meet on Friday at 9 p.m. MoMo admonished him that he would have to maintain contact with her over the course of the days leading up to the […]
People Who Stalk MoMo’s Friends
While attending a first grade parents-only event, a silly specimen made advances on Princess MoMo’s friend Vanessa via bar napkin. Below is a picture of the vehicle of flirtation. Mike the dreamer didn’t stop there. Subsequent to his intro by napkin, with which Vanessa should have used to wipe her hands clean of him, […]
Online Dating: An enjoyable message exchange example
Specimen’s opening message: Subject line: The problem is no one thinks they suck Creative profile, very concise :) I think you’d be better off at a barnes & nobles than this site, but since you’re here I just wanted to say: hi lil mama, you mad fine Princess MoMo’s response: Hey big papi, I’m glad […]
Online Dating Fails: Digital Deficiency
Specimen: hi im kon u are cute tex me lets talk 215REDACTED not oin hre alot hwt nationalty are u Princess MoMo: Is there an issue with your fingers? Specimen: wht u mean sweety Evidently, including all letters in a word was too much to ask from this specimen.
Online Dating Fails: A dumbass message and Princess MoMo’s poetic response
Specimen’s opening message: tell me please lil mama. why is that we never talk?? never grab dinner? never go out? never chill out and watch movies. go get ink work done,lol? fishing/offroading/paintballing/sky diving trips? motor cycle trips, never do anything? lol tell me please babe. names joe if interested, nd I am sophisticated enough […]
Special Delivery: Princess MoMo gets a package
Princess MoMo and a specimen for whom she has not yet coined a name had a date scheduled for Friday, April 29, 2011. Arrangements for this date were made roughly two weeks in advance. However, thanks to sloppy facebook practices on MoMo’s part, she not only canceled the date, but potentially offended the specimen. On […]
More on RoboCop
Background: Princess MoMo has known RoboCop since 2005. Every so often, he makes advances on her. Said advances used to be more frequent, but it appears that at some point, rejection became less appealing to him. He recently denied her of a PBA card for about a month and a half because he is of […]
Conversation with Former Specimen RoboCop
RoboCop: I’m going to the gym. Princess: Yeah, you used to be more jacked. You looked better that way. What happened? RoboCop: I hurt my spine. Princess: How? RoboCop: I was doing 315 lbs. shoulder shrugs, competing against my buddy. We were basically having a dick measuring contest. Princess: And you didn’t measure up, did […]
Texts with a Non-Detestable Specimen
After the initial exchange and first date with the non-detestable specimen (“NDS”), Princess MoMo was apathetic until NDS once again temporarily became amusing (not for long though). NDS and MoMo had an interesting telephone conversation during which they joked about procreating to form either a mini-MoMo or NDS Jr. Subsequent to their hypothetical joint […]
Online Dating Fails: Asphyxiation
Guy: hi cutei I see yr pics y looks so sweet .call me my numbet 569/xxx/5071 Princess: I would say don’t hold your breath waiting on me to call you, but I actually think you should. Guy: ok
Online Dating Fails: Black Kettle
Guy: wow u sound incredible look forward to talking to u more do u like to ski or snowmobile or go boating or camping at all Princess: No. I actually don’t like any of those things. Moreover, your writing is atrocious. Guy: whats moreover mean well nothing like calling the kettle black duh u smart Princess: […]
Specimen Suitor Attempts to Lure me in with Princess MoMo Speak
On Saturday night, Princess MoMo discovered that her group of friends was no longer present in the bar. But more disturbing, one of said friends had absconded with her device! MoMo was alarmed. She did a scan of the bar for a specimen worthy to help her track down her missing apparatus. She approached her […]
Specimen Dissection: April 29, 2011 Date Recap
Some time ago, I posted an entry about an online dating specimen that I did not detest. As you might expect, my instincts were correct. I provided the specimen with the number to my device and he subsequently made text contact. Below are some of the introductory texts exchanged as well as a brief […]
Online Dating Fails: False Expectations
Guy: Sometimes you need to not expect, but to expect the unexpected. If that makes sense… Princess: No. It does not make sense at all. One cannot not expect yet expect the unexpected at the same time because in expecting the unexpected, one is expecting and therefore, not not expecting. Guy: Lol I like you:) […]
The Landfill of Dating Websites: Why Euthanasia should be Legalized.
For purposes of blog research and development (thanks Joe), I’ve joined several new dating sites. Based on my experiences, I can tell you that there is certainly a difference in the quality of users from site to site. On Sunday night, I added a new site to my online dating portfolio, Richmen.com. Upon posting my […]